Sitting here with nothing to say and everything to say

I sit here thinking I need to say something because that is why I started this blog.  It seems as of late that I have not said much on here and I know it is because I am saying it in other ways. 

In the submission process it feels as if so much of your focus goes in to making sure everything is in order and everything is done in such a proper way that there is no room for error.  I realize this takes so much more of my energy.  Is it because it is different then the creative process which I am so used to,  partially.  Is it because I am going thru a process of expressing myself in a medium different then I ever imagined,  I think so.  So in a way I am giving birth to a new creative process in me and deliveries can be exhausting.  In the birth of something new it is always important to be ever present,  to be completely committed to the moment in order to understand what it is you are birthing.  What will this new entity be like.  How do I give it the love and support it needs and how do I in the same moment stay to myself and my truths.

I guess there is only one way to find out.  To experience that which I have not.

100 Artist Submission Packets. What Are You Crazy???

Yes that is what I am doing.  Brain fry,  fuzzy brain.  That is what I have now. Is it from thinking about sending all those packets.  NO.  It is from actually doing it.  OK they have not technically all gone out but they are in the process.  By end of next weekend it will all be done.  What a gamble some may say,  I say not.  What an amazing experience to actually go thru.  The intent and focus is no where (mostly) except getting it done.  I have never done anything quite this ambitious so I look at it as things to come.  It will be a warm up prepping for the future.  

It feels like I am Into The InBetween.  The same InBetween I talk about in my artist statement from October of '06.  This is a little different though,  in the way that it is more a physical placement of my reality changing instead of a meta-physical changing reality.  I am in the InBetween place between my past life and my future one that seems to be rushing towards me. I look forward to it and the closer I get the more I know I will be OK with all of the future experiences that will be so different from my past ones.  I pause for a moment thinking about this and taking the beauty of it in with a smile and tears of joy in my eyes.